Pigeon committee declares economy 'mostly fine,' adjourns to chase a bagel

After a four-minute session on the courthouse steps, the panel ruled 11-2 that things are 'mostly fine.' Two members abstained due to bread.

By Deb Klatch, Markets Desk

The committee in session. The bagel did not survive the vote.

The Galactic Economic Committee, a panel of thirteen pigeons that meets on the courthouse steps, issued its quarterly ruling Wednesday after a session lasting just under four minutes.

Chairman Greg, a large gray pigeon with one good foot, opened proceedings by walking in a small circle. Testimony was heard from a squirrel, which was later discredited.

The final ruling was "Coo." The committee clerk, also a pigeon, translates this as "mostly fine."

Markets rallied three percent on the news, then dropped six percent when a man dropped half a bagel and the entire committee left mid-sentence.

"Honestly, this is the most decisive economic body we've had in years," said one analyst. "They make a call and they move on. They don't have to read anything. They can't."

The next session is Thursday, weather permitting, near the fountain.